Authentic Relating taught me to move from small talk to big connection.
I grew up in rural Wisconsin, with no neighborhood kids to play with and two sisters who spent more time with each other. And so I spent most of my time on a computer which my Dad brought home when I was 8, and never developed good social skills. And then through grade and high school I was bullied and didn't think I deserved to have friends. Even after university and getting a job at IBM, I drank rather than learn to connect, and eventually got married because it felt like the next thing I was “supposed” to do.
It wasn’t until divorce, drug use, and many failed relationships years later that I discovered Authentic Relating. I realized I how exhausting it was to be continually planning what I would say so that people would like me. I discovered the freedom of being vulnerable and honest. Nearly every week over two years, I practiced Authentic Relating and Circling. I continually peeled away the layers of pretending to be someone I wasn't. And even though now I am less "put together", I am ALIVE!
I've now facilitated Authentic Relating workshops internationally for 5 years. I have seen firsthand how liberating it can be for people to finally share things which they've been holding onto for years, and how shockingly fast someone can go from stranger to trusted companion simply by creating the right context.