With Human Design, I was finally able to love and appreciate myself.
I was first introduced to Human Design 8 years ago during my first trip to Thailand back in 2010, and I always found it fascinating. But like many people, all I learned is "I'm a Generator" and not how to actually put it into practice. It was only years later that I actually started putting the knowledge to use; and it's why when I teach, I provide practical tools rather than mental knowledge.
At the time I had just completed my life coaching program with the Robbins-Madanes institute and wanted to share what I learned with others: doing the thing where you share free content on social media so that people can learn about you. And so I got my camera out and I knew basically what I wanted to say … and then I froze. Nothing would come out! So I started talking a bit, you know how this is, to just warm things up … and nothing but crazy talk was coming out.
And it was so frustrating! t did this a couple times, and rarely did I get anything good. And when I did, I had to do so many retakes because I would just have long pauses where my mind would go I don’t know where. So I tried something different: I did a Facebook Live and someone came online and just with her there, things flowed … effortlessly. Whereas before I had these long pauses where my mind went on holiday … with her there, I couldn’t shut up! One thing would lead to another, and time flew, and it was effortless.
As I continued learning about my unique design, I learned other reasons why this is challenging for me. There are circuits in our bodies specifically for sharing, without any need for someone to share back. And you can see if there is any energy for this. And I have nothing: most people have at least one Sharing strength, and I have none.
What I do have are Support strengths. If you want my help on something, I really want to get something in return. It doesn’t have to be the same amount, or at the same time: but I feel really good when I’m helping people and they are helping me. It’s tribal. It’s communal. It’s an energy exchange. And it’s the reason I am creating Kula, a platform for communities of support and connection.
And so I continued to research and learn and educate myself, and take courses on Human Design, and then on BG5 which is focused on business and accepting the person as they are, rather than the original Human Design which is focused on awakening humanity. And I realized that most people who are getting “human design readings” are not getting anything practical. They’re getting a bunch of knowledge and then not doing anything with it. It’s the same problem that I originally had: I was given some knowledge and then didn’t do anything with it.
I continued to lean into my true nature, I understood how many design was reflected through my way of being. And my seeing this, I could relax into things that previously bothered me. For example, I judged that I couldn't keep friends because people would continually come into and leave my life. I now I understand this is simply part of my 3/5 nature.
The virtuous cycle of understanding and leaning in has been a game-changer for how I live my life. I would never go back to my old way of continually striving for people to like me. I encourage everyone to find a qualified teacher and analyst like me to start on the path to knowing yourself and living in the flow.